One of Those Days

I woke up this morning earlier than my wife, as I typically do, and sat on the couch in pajama pants and a t-shirt catching up on the internet or playing the daily rounds of Fairway solitaire. I read a story that was really upsetting and shared it to facebook, and felt my mood shift. I entered an emotional funk that was not really lifted for a few hours, when I read another long article, this one not so much upsetting as grim, but it seemed to help. In between I spent a lot of time with the Buddhist Voice in my head, reminding me to seek balance. My asshole brain took that as a cue to start spinning comics ideas out of whatever BV said.

While Nicole visited her family in the afternoon, I finished writing the script for the latest episode of Sunday Night in Cinema 3 and was pleased with it. I recorded the episode, pausing the recording at one point while the cat made some noise getting dry food from her food puzzle. Yes, I said food puzzle. I finished the recording just before Nicole got home.

We talked and made dinner, watched some TV, and I went to edit and publish the podcast. I edit along until I get to the part where I paused for the cat noise and… there’s nothing after it. I don’t know if I didn’t resume the recording properly, or if I somehow deleted the second section, but in any case, it isn’t there. So the episode will be a day late, I will re-record the missing section tomorrow and publish it after work.

One of those days. But honestly, I’m not bothered. I’d gladly trade some little mishaps for being in a happy and productive mood.

We went for a skate on the last day of the season this morning, and talked about wanting to do more travel this summer within the province, as well as day trips to the beach and perhaps a longer jaunt around Cape Breton, where I haven’t been since I was a child. We also want to do some camping and kayaking; perhaps I will even give surfing another go. The weather has been warming enough and I have been working out often enough during the winter that I feel like I can get back to running outside again soon.

Upsetting think-pieces aside, it was a pretty good week, more so because of a general increase in productivity at my day job, which makes me feel less general anxiety. I wrapped up the work week by doing my annual fantasy baseball draft with some old friends on Friday night and a local record fair on Saturday morning.

That’s it. Look for the podcast tomorrow and some other stuff to publish this week. Have a good one.

 

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Spring Forward

It’s been a good week, despite my son falling ill for much of his March break, spending half of it prone on my couch and the other half propped up in his mom’s basement playing video games. I managed to be reasonably productive without feeling a lot of stress about it, which is a good zone to find and stay in.

As I write this I have just come back in from my third excursion of the day. The first was skating on the Emera Loop with my dear wife this morning. The second was a walk to the waterfront, by way of the central library to return a book and DeSerres, where a thick pad of their watercolour paper and a pad of their mixed media paper made me an offer I couldn’t refuse.

My ultimate goal for the waterfront was to pick up this week’s comics at Strange Adventures, and it was most of my pull list: new issues of Assassinistas, Black Bolt, Captain America, Giant Days, Jughead: The Hunger, and The Wicked + The Divine, plus a Harley and Ivy comic with a cover by Tula Lotay, whose work I buy wherever possible. A few of those titles are ending soon or have ended already, so I added a few upcoming books to the list to try out.

The third walk was in the opposite direction, to the Anchor Archive zine library on Almon street, in the Radstorm space. I donated some copies of recent zines and comics after meaning to for ages. I also gave them some extra copies of what I have in my inventory for sample zine packs that they were talking about putting together. If you’re in the Halifax area and you are interested in zines (making them or reading them), you should pay them a visit.

The new episode of Sunday Night in Cinema 3 is up. Do check it out, won’t you? And speaking of movies, I realize that the new Tomb Raider is probably the destination for most moviegoing manchildren next weekend, but if you want to see a film that is genuinely special, one that is fresh and smart, I urge you to check out the teen dramedy Love, Simon. It’s directed by Riverdale showrunner Greg Berlanti, based on an excellent YA novel called Simon Vs. the Homo Sapiens Agenda by Becky Albertelli, a child psychologist turned author. Nicole and I saw a sneak preview of Love, Simon last night and absolutely loved it. I am so glad that gay kids and their allies will have it, however it does at the box office.

And speaking of Albertelli, the sequel to Simon, called Leah on the Offbeat, comes out next month. Her second book, set in the same book-universe, was called The Upside of Unrequited, and I also recommend it. I love good YA fiction, the more of it kids have to choose from, the better.

I was feeling glum after taking my son home, as I usually do, and I decided to cheer myself up by spending some time working on one of the card games I hope to publish sometime this year. It’s called Story Mode, and it will be an open source project. I plan on working on its alpha website after this blog post, so if you want to read more about how that would work, I’ll explain there.

Anyway, I had a couple of little breakthroughs, both in terms of the game taking shape in my mind and in technical terms. I was able to map out a development strategy for the game, basically taking it through alpha and beta editions before publishing a true 1.0 release for public consumption. I’ll go into that in more detail on the Story Mode website too, if you are interested in downloading a copy of whatever I have ready or playtesting. Or both.

So it has been a pleasant surprise to work on that at the end of the week, and my new goal is to have the alpha version posted online and printed for a limited distribution. The game will always be free to download online, but if you want a physical copy that comes from me, the easiest method to ensure you get one is to join my Patreon.

I am going to be doing my first mailout to patrons at all levels in the next few weeks, as an orientation package. It will include a new exclusive minicomic, the alpha version of the Story Mode game, a little bit of original art, some small prints and probably a mid sized print, a holder to put it all in, and my eternal gratitude. So don’t miss out!

Vacation, All I Ever Wanted

I’m off work this week because it is my son Jack’s March break from school, and he is here to visit for some of it. Unfortunately he has come down with a 24-hour flu that has about 6 hours left, so he’s prone on the new couch binge-watching The Last Ship. It’s good to see him in any case.

My wife hosted an Oscar party last night and we were all like zombies this morning due to the lack of sleep. I sat in a corner, facing away from the TV, snarking at the many things I hate about the Oscars, and I fear I overdid it. Snark is, I think, like wasabi. Best in small strategic doses, not an Axe body spray of sourness.

I also recorded the latest episode of Sunday Night in Cinema 3 yesterday, and I had some things to say about the Oscars, including:

What a perfect summary it is of Hollywood that on the same weekend they meet to hand out gold statues and jerk each other off, they release a remake of Death Wish, an NRA member’s wet dream, about a good man with a gun who decides to take his country back from the lowlifes. I don’t care how many gay films or black films or women’s films they greenlight to make themselves feel better; as long as they keep greenlighting shit like Death Wish, because they know it’s a sure sale in red states, Hollywood is complicit in the suffering of hate crime victims.

And for that matter, as much as I respect the #timesup movement and the many actors who have come forward to tell their story of being abused by powerful men, there is a giant gap in that story as long as no one is talking about the “Church” of Scientology, which enslaves its members, threatens them, sexually abuses them, and who knows what else. If anyone’s time should be up, it is Scientology.

But by all means, Hollywood, enjoy your annual celebration of yourself.

Jeez, chill, past-me.

I’m actually starting to think about how much “knee-jerk negativity just never got me through,” like the Psychedelic Furs said once. The snark, the anger, the little splashes of jealousy; I think I need to get my nose closer to the grindstone of my Buddhism. Concentrate, in other words, on what I say and do so as to avoid wearing a trench of negativity in my brain.

I’ve been a Buddhist for about 20 years now, and while I would never claim to even have my shit together, never mind be enlightened, I feel like I am managing my dosage better than I did in my initial fervor. My poor friends back then, listening to me jabber on about the dharma and the noble eightfold path. These days it’s more like a radio station that plays in the background of my thoughts, and it’s time for me to turn it up a little.

Lately one of those things I have been thinking about working harder on is the concept of “right speech” from the Noble Eightfold. It doesn’t mean conservatism, or censorship, or being “politically correct”, or any such thing. It simply applies mindfulness to how you interact with others, be it in person or online.

I think the fastest way to fill in that trench in the mind that we make from knee-jerk snark or negativity is to be the opposite. To love everything, at least insofar as that is possible. Do I really need to angrily retweet shit about the current “President” several times a day? Could I be encouraging or supporting someone else in that same amount of time? Can I take my brain out of the bath of bad news and unhappy social media shares where it normally swims?

Again, this doesn’t mean ignoring the bad shit or pretending that everything is great. It’s more a matter of letting go of the small stuff, and concentrating on a better balance of information coming in. It’s just another expression of one of the core concepts of Buddhism, which is to see the world as it is, without the filter of a largely imaginary self-image, cultural baggage, and other obstacles. It’s similar to what I try to do with my spare time, which is divide it equally between creative work and relaxing.

For those of you who follow The Insult, I’m a few comics behind but I plan to catch up on that and some other things after I take the boy home. And hopefully, by next weekend if not this one, I will slap together the first episode of a new podcast that I’ve been ever so slowly working on.